Child Discipline

To spank or not to spank. That is the question many parents struggle with. Regardless of whether or not you believe that the occasional spanking is necessary, it's important to understand, and use, other, more positive ways of disciplining your child. Most parents spank out of frustration. Spanking does little to teach children other than an immediate "don't do that!" Positive discipline can be used to teach children how to self-regulate their behavior and may be more useful than spanking. Spanking out of frustration is more for your benefit than your child's. Spanking satisfies an immediate need. Before spanking, ask yourself if there is another way to handle the situation.

Why Do You Spank a Child?

Ask yourself why you spank. Do you tend to spank more when you're tired? When you're stressed, does spanking seem like the only solution? Are there times you spank more than others? Think about when you spank, and you may realize that, if you take a step back you may not feel the need to spank.

Conflict Resolution: A House Full of Calm

Spanking can cause chaos, anger, and set a tone of violence. Ask yourself if that is the atmosphere you want in your home. Sure, using methods such as reinforcement and positive discipline take a lot more effort, but they also teach non-violent conflict resolution, respect, and values. Isn't that what you ultimately want your child to learn?

Better Child Discipline Methods?

Communicating with your child may be a better way to change behavior than spanking. Find out why your child acts in certain ways. Most kids act out for the same reason parents spank – frustration. Ask your child why he is frustrated. Help him put his feelings into words. And, do the same for yourself before you spank. Why are you frustrated? Put your feelings into words. Talk to your child and encourage him to talk to you. Set limits and talk about ways to solve problems.

Behavior Charts instead of Punishment

Try implementing a behavior chart to begin positive parenting. On the chart, list a few behaviors you want your child to work on most. Award points when the behaviors are met and enable your child to exchange their points for small rewards you establish. The rewards reinforce the good behavior and over time, the behavior becomes a habit. You and your child can learn together that there may be better ways to solve a problem.